Nowhere to go?
Nothing to do?
Tired of Facebook?
Tired of Twitter?
No new videos on YouTube?
Email not working quickly enough?
It’s the newest thing in today’s rapidly advancing world.
Guaranteed to cause you stress, pain, and feverish delusions.
100% No fun!
It’s the only thing you will never want to finish!
Try some today!
Some side effects include:
Sleeping well at night
More relaxing down time
The very word brings fear to a college student’s eyes and trembling to his knees. It brings aching to his hand. It produces a migraine and nightmares for a week.
It is the final word, the final grade.
College students either don’t sleep at all or dream of sleeping through finals. They know that the grade they receive for this, their final assignment, may decide their future forever.
Food is a rare luxury. Any free moments a student has are spent worrying about finals or trying to remember the answer they forgot. Every word said in class leading up to a final seems of utmost importance- perhaps the difference between failing and passing.
Students who typically sleep through class set their alarms an hour early, just to make sure they can hit the snooze button and still make it to class on time to take the biggest test of the year.
Teachers grin evilly, knowing that they hold all the power. Students cower before them on Finals Day. There is not escape.
Homework is neglected for studying. Assignments are failed, but no one cares as long as they are studying for the final.
Meals are skipped. Notebooks are seen on everyone’s lap. Drinks are barely touched, seeing as students don’t have a free hand. They are occupied with books, pencils, and notes.
Computers slowly disappear, and are replaced by pages and pages of printed notes, usually accompanied by a highlighter in one of an assortment of bright, garish colors.
There is no safe place. No rest.
Sleep? Who does that during this most stressful of weeks?
Be very afraid.