This is going to be a pretty short blog, but I just had to get this out there and share my thoughts with you guys.
I was struck by something tonight.
I’m so caught up in worrying about my job, getting an apartment, getting a better phone, travelling, getting people’s approval…and I was so bogged down in all the stuff I need for ME. Then I glanced over at the Voice of the Martyr publication next to me, rifled through it, and found this quote:
As they struck me [with machetes], I raised my hand to block,” Amina said. “I shouted and said, ‘Oh my God! I am finished today. Oh God forgive me.” They then hit me again. They also cut my head, but I did not feel the pain. I was lying down in the pool of blood until they finished.
…and then I realized something.
I am so incredibly selfish.
The lady from the story in the publication had been beaten, stabbed, and otherwise abused for simply the fact that she believed in God.
I’m worried about not getting a nice, comfy job where I can be comfortable and do what I like, when there are others out there who literally don’t have anything to begin with. I’m spending all my time worrying and obsessing with little, inconsequential things that don’t ultimately lead me anywhere but down a more worldly road.
It’s time to stop looking for things here and start looking for what God wants. It’s time to stop living for things I want and start helping others and spreading God’s grace.
I can’t believe I’ve been so selfish.
Time to change.